[Section] - Engaging and Resolving Conflict
Emotional Intelligence
Reflecting builds self-awareness (Inquiry) and emotional clarity (Vitality).
Empathy supports healthy emotional environments (Vitality) and builds stronger social connections (Interconnectedness).
Emotional regulation sustains health (Vitality) and supports consistent behavior (Perseverance).
TABLE OF CONTENTs - Emotional Intelligence
REFLECT - Self-Reflection Questions To Start The Learning Process
EXPLORE - Core Principles and Concepts About Fostering Emotional Intelligence
EXAMINE - Lessons on Reflection, Empathy, and Regulation
ENGAGE - Engaging New Ideas and Applying Them in Daily Life
REFLECT - Emotional Intelligence
Self-reflection is a powerful tool to increase self-awareness and prepare mentally and emotionally to engage new ideas!
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As you begin to think about your own knowledge of emotional intelligence, ask yourself the following questions.
How well do I manage my emotions when things do not go as planned?
Do I recognize my emotions in the moment or only after the situation has passed?
How do I respond when I notice someone else is struggling emotionally?
EXPLORE - Emotional Intelligence
Build emotional and practical connections to new ideas!
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Emotions are a natural part of everyday life. As a student-athlete, you experience highs and lows both on and off the field. Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions while also being aware of how others are feeling. Developing emotional intelligence helps you handle challenges, build stronger relationships, and communicate more effectively in both personal and team settings.
The first step in emotional intelligence is self-awareness. This means paying attention to your emotions as they happen and recognizing how they influence your thoughts and actions. Whether you are feeling frustrated after a tough loss or anxious before a big exam, being aware of these feelings helps you take control of your response rather than letting your emotions control you.
Once you recognize your emotions, self-regulation allows you to manage them in a healthy way. Instead of reacting impulsively when you feel upset or discouraged, you learn to pause, take a breath, and respond calmly. Self-regulation does not mean ignoring your feelings but finding ways to express them appropriately so that they do not harm your relationships or performance.
Motivation is another part of emotional intelligence. It is about staying focused on your goals even when you face setbacks or feel discouraged. Emotionally intelligent athletes find ways to push through challenges by reminding themselves of their purpose and staying committed to their long-term growth rather than giving in to temporary frustration.
Empathy allows you to understand and respect the emotions of others. On a team, empathy helps you recognize when a teammate is struggling, celebrate their successes, or offer support when they need it. When you take time to listen and show that you care, you build trust and strengthen the bonds that hold your team together.
Social skills are also part of emotional intelligence. These include how you interact with others, resolve conflicts, and work as part of a group. Emotionally intelligent athletes know how to communicate with respect, give and receive feedback, and handle disagreements without creating unnecessary drama or division.
During conflict, emotional intelligence becomes especially important. Recognizing your own emotions and reading the emotions of others helps you approach disagreements with patience and understanding. Instead of reacting defensively, you can focus on finding solutions that benefit both sides while protecting the strength of the relationship.
Developing emotional intelligence takes practice. It is not always easy to stay calm under pressure or to recognize how your words affect others. Over time, however, these skills become habits that allow you to handle stress, maintain strong relationships, and lead both yourself and others more effectively.
In the long run, emotional intelligence will serve you far beyond your time as a student-athlete. In your future career, family life, and personal relationships, the ability to manage emotions, communicate with empathy, and stay composed in difficult situations will help you succeed and grow.
In the end, emotional intelligence is not about avoiding emotions. It is about learning how to work with them in a way that supports your success and strengthens your connections with others. The more you build this skill, the more prepared you will be to face challenges with confidence and resilience.
EXAMINE - Reflection
By being aware of your emotional triggers and patterns, you can make more conscious decisions and maintain a healthy balance between the demands of college and athletics.
Reflect on Emotions: Take time to reflect on your emotions regularly. Pause and ask yourself how you're feeling in different situations, both positive and negative. Pay attention to the nuances of your emotions and try to identify their triggers.
Practice Mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness exercises to cultivate present-moment awareness. Mindfulness helps you observe your thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations without judgment. By being fully present, you can develop a deeper understanding of your emotional experiences.
Keep a Journal: Maintain a journal where you can express and explore your emotions. Write about the situations that elicit specific emotions and reflect on how they impact your thoughts, behaviors, and overall well-being. Journaling can help you gain insights into patterns and trends in your emotional responses.
Seek Feedback: Seek feedback from trusted friends, family members, or mentors. Ask them for their observations about your emotions and behaviors. Their perspectives can provide valuable insights into aspects of your emotional self that you may not be aware of.
Engage Self-Reflection: Set aside regular time for self-reflection. Create a space where you can introspect and evaluate your emotions, reactions, and patterns of behavior. Consider how your emotions influence your decision-making, relationships, and overall college experience.
Learn More: Seek out workshops or courses on emotional intelligence and self-awareness. These educational opportunities can provide you with tools, techniques, and frameworks to deepen your understanding of emotions and develop self-awareness.
Practice Regulation: Learn and practice strategies for managing and regulating your emotions effectively. This may involve deep breathing exercises, relaxation techniques, or seeking support from counseling services on campus. Developing emotional regulation skills enhances your ability to respond to emotions in a healthy and constructive manner.
Seek Support: If you find it challenging to navigate and understand your emotions, don't hesitate to seek support from a counselor or therapist. They can provide guidance and create a safe space for exploring and processing emotions.
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EXAMINE - Empathy
Developing empathy enhances team cohesion and leads to a more inclusive and supportive environment where everyone can all thrive.
Recognize Empathy: Empathy is a crucial skill in teamwork. Emphasize that empathy fosters trust, understanding, and effective communication within teams.
Promote Perspectives: Put yourself in others' shoes and consider their perspectives, thoughts, and emotions. This involves actively listening to teammates, seeking to understand their viewpoints, and acknowledging their feelings.
Active Listening: This involves fully engaging in conversations and demonstrating genuine interest in what others have to say. Listen without interruption, ask clarifying questions, and provide supportive and non-judgmental responses. This helps build understanding among team members.
Foster Inclusion: Team environments value diversity and inclusivity. There are benefits of diverse perspectives and experiences in problem-solving and decision-making. Embrace and appreciate individual differences and actively seek input from all team members.
Empathetic Communication: This involves using respectful and compassionate language, being mindful of tone and body language, and validating others' emotions and experiences.
Team-Building: Participate in team-building activities that encourage empathy and cooperation. These activities can include problem-solving challenges, role-playing exercises, or group discussions centered around empathy and understanding. Reflect on these activities to reinforce the value of empathy in your team.
Lead by Example: Model empathetic behavior as a team leader. Demonstrate active listening, open-mindedness, and understanding in your interactions with students. Encourage and reward empathetic behaviors within teams, highlighting the positive impact it has on collaboration and team success.
Reflect and Debrief: Engage in reflective discussions or debrief sessions after team activities or projects. Reflect on how empathy influences teamwork and outcomes. Hold discussions on lessons learned, challenges faced, and strategies for further cultivating empathy within teams.
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EXAMINE - Regulation
Emotional regulation allows you to manage your emotions effectively, especially during high-pressure situations like competitions or exams. Experiencing emotions is natural, but it's essential to channel them constructively rather than letting them control your actions and decisions.
Recognize Emotions: Develop self-awareness by recognizing and labeling your emotions in team situations. Identify when you're feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, or anxious. Simply acknowledging your emotions can help you gain control over them.
Pause: When you notice intense emotions rising, take deep breaths and pause for a moment. Deep breathing triggers the body's relaxation response and helps calm the nervous system. This pause allows you to collect your thoughts and respond in a more composed manner.
Practice Mindfulness: Cultivate mindfulness techniques to stay present and focused during team interactions. This involves observing your thoughts and emotions without judgment and redirecting your attention back to the present moment. Mindfulness helps prevent emotional hijacking and enables more thoughtful responses.
Engage in Self-Talk: Use positive and constructive self-talk to manage your emotions. Replace negative or self-defeating thoughts with affirmations or statements that promote self-confidence and resilience. Remind yourself of your capabilities and the value you bring to the team.
Seek Perspective: When faced with challenging situations, try to see things from different perspectives. Consider other team members' viewpoints and try to understand their motivations and concerns. This broader perspective can help you regulate emotions and approach conflicts or disagreements more empathetically.
Active Listening: Engage in active listening when interacting with team members. Give your full attention, avoid interrupting, and genuinely try to understand their perspectives. Active listening reduces misunderstandings and defensiveness, leading to more constructive conversations and emotional regulation.
Effective Communication: Express your thoughts and emotions assertively and respectfully. Clearly communicate your needs, concerns, or frustrations using "I" statements and focus on the specific behaviors or situations causing distress. Effective communication reduces emotional tension and promotes understanding.
Take Breaks: If you feel overwhelmed or stressed during team situations, don't hesitate to take short breaks to recharge. Engage in activities that help you relax and rejuvenate, such as going for a walk, listening to music, or practicing mindfulness exercises. Prioritize self-care to maintain emotional well-being.
Seek Support: If you find it challenging to regulate your emotions in team situations, reach out for support. Talk to a trusted friend, mentor, or counselor who can provide guidance and perspective. They can offer strategies to manage difficult emotions effectively.
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ENGAGE - Emotional Intelligence
Please look over the following prompts. You’ll be asked to participate in a short discussion about what you have learned, either individually or in a group, with a REBOOT Coach and/or guest speakers. Think about how these lessons will benefit you most in school, competition, and life!
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QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF :
[Reflection]
When something upsets or frustrates you, how do you process it after the moment has passed? What patterns have you noticed in how you think about your reactions?
[Empathy]
Think of a time when you were able to understand or relate to someone else's emotions, even if their experience was different from yours. How did that connection affect the outcome of the situation?
[Regulation]
How do you calm yourself down or stay composed when your emotions start to take over - especially in competitive or high-pressure situations? What techniques work best for you?
QUESTIONS TO ASK OTHERS :
[Reflection]
How do you help team members reflect on emotional reactions or behavior after a game, meeting, or conflict? What role does reflection play in personal growth
[Empathy]
What does empathy look like in action within a team setting, and how do you encourage players to support each other emotionally?
[Regulation]
What tools or advice do you offer student-athletes who are learning to manage strong emotions in healthy and productive ways?
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES - Emotional Intelligence
If you would like to learn more about Emotional Intelligence, please consider the following resources!
FLCC Athletics - 8/GREAT - HANDOUT - EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE [PDF]
Emotional Intelligence
Michael Van Etten - REBOOT - Didactic Tactics LLC - All Rights Reserved