[Section] - Engaging and Resolving Conflict
Conflict Resolution
Understanding multiple views promotes empathy (Interconnectedness) and critical thinking (Inquiry).
Repairing relationships takes persistence (Perseverance) and care for others (Interconnectedness).
Solving conflict together reflects shared effort (Perseverance) and connection (Interconnectedness).
TABLE OF CONTENTs - Conflict Resolution
REFLECT - Self-Reflection Questions To Start The Learning Process
EXPLORE - Core Principles and Concepts About Conflict Resolution Skills
EXAMINE - Lessons on Perspective, Reconciliation, and Resolution
ENGAGE - Engaging New Ideas and Applying Them in Daily Life
REFLECT - Conflict Resolution
Self-reflection is a powerful tool to increase self-awareness and prepare mentally and emotionally to engage new ideas!
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As you begin to think about ways that you personally resolve conflict, ask yourself the following questions.
When you experience conflict with a teammate or coach, what is your first instinct? Why do you think you react that way?
Think about a past conflict you experienced. What would have changed if you had taken more time to understand the other person’s perspective?
How comfortable are you with offering a sincere apology or accepting one from someone else? What makes that process difficult or meaningful for you?
EXPLORE - Conflict Resolution
Build emotional and practical connections to new ideas!
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Conflict is part of life, but how you resolve it can make the difference between growth and lasting tension. As a student-athlete, you will face situations where disagreements arise, whether with teammates, coaches, professors, or peers. Conflict resolution is about finding ways to move forward while protecting relationships, team culture, and your own personal growth.
The first step in resolving conflict is understanding that both sides bring their own perspectives. People see situations differently based on their experiences, feelings, and expectations. Taking time to recognize the other person’s point of view, even if you disagree, creates space for more productive conversations. This shows respect and helps lower defensiveness on both sides.
Effective conflict resolution starts with clear and respectful communication. Instead of focusing on who is right or wrong, focus on the issue itself. Speak calmly, explain how the situation affected you, and be open to hearing how it affected the other person. Keeping the conversation focused on the problem, not personal attacks, allows both sides to feel heard.
Listening fully is just as important as speaking. Often, people listen only to prepare their response instead of really hearing what the other person is saying. Active listening means setting aside your own thoughts for a moment and focusing entirely on the other person’s words. This builds trust and shows that you care about finding a solution rather than simply defending your position.
Sometimes, the solution involves compromise. Both sides may need to give a little to reach an agreement that works. Compromise is not about giving up your values, but about finding a way forward that respects the needs of everyone involved. A healthy compromise leaves both sides feeling that their voices mattered.
In other cases, resolution may require agreeing to disagree. Not every conflict has a perfect solution, and sometimes people hold different opinions that cannot be fully reconciled. When handled respectfully, it is possible to maintain a strong relationship even when you do not see eye to eye on every issue.
Apologies can play an important role in resolving conflict. A sincere apology acknowledges the hurt caused and takes responsibility for actions that contributed to the problem. Apologizing does not mean you are admitting full blame, but it shows a willingness to repair trust and move forward.
Forgiveness is equally important. Holding onto anger or resentment after a conflict prevents healing and can create ongoing tension. Forgiving others, and sometimes forgiving yourself, allows both sides to let go of past mistakes and focus on rebuilding trust and teamwork.
In team settings, strong conflict resolution strengthens the entire group. When teammates see that disagreements can be handled with maturity and respect, it creates a culture where people feel safe to be honest and work through challenges together. This trust makes the team more united and better prepared for future challenges.
In the end, conflict resolution is a skill that requires patience, practice, and a commitment to maintaining healthy relationships. The ability to handle conflict with respect and maturity will serve you not only as a student-athlete, but throughout your career and personal life for years to come.
EXAMINE - Perspective
Gaining perspective allows you to better understand the emotions, motivations, and experiences of others during conflict. By stepping outside your own point of view, you can approach disagreements with empathy, reduce misunderstandings, and build stronger team relationships. Embracing different perspectives is a key step toward resolving conflict in a respectful and thoughtful way.
Understand That Everyone Has a Story: Each person brings different experiences, values, and emotions into a conflict. Taking time to understand those differences helps you approach problems more fairly and thoughtfully.
Step Outside Your Own Viewpoint: Try to see the situation from your teammate’s perspective before reacting. Shifting your mindset can reveal solutions you may not have considered.
Avoid Jumping to Conclusions: Give others a chance to explain their side fully before forming opinions. Snap judgments often ignore important details that can change how you view the conflict.
Ask Questions to Learn, Not to Win: Use curiosity to explore others’ viewpoints, not to argue or prove a point. Learning from others shows maturity and a willingness to grow.
Recognize Emotional Triggers: Be aware of what makes you upset and consider what may trigger others. Understanding emotional responses allows for more compassionate conversations.
Respect Cultural and Personal Differences: Teammates may communicate differently based on background or personality. Being mindful of these differences helps you interpret actions and words more accurately.
Accept That Perception Shapes Reality: How someone feels about a situation matters, even if you experienced it differently. Acknowledging this builds empathy and reduces tension.
Practice Patience in Difficult Moments: Gaining perspective often takes time and reflection. Being patient allows space for understanding and healing.
Remember You Don’t Have the Full Picture: Conflicts often involve unseen stress or outside factors. Staying open to new information prevents unfair judgments.
Use Perspective to Build Trust: Showing that you care about how others think and feel strengthens your credibility as a teammate and leader. Trust grows when people feel heard and understood.
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EXAMINE - Reconciliation
Reconciliation is about repairing relationships after conflict. Oftentimes, settling the disagreement is not enough. By taking responsibility, offering and accepting sincere apologies, and rebuilding trust through action, you show your commitment to your team and your growth as a teammate. True reconciliation values the connection more than the conflict and creates space for stronger bonds moving forward.
Take Responsibility for Your Part: Acknowledge your role in the conflict, even if it was unintentional. Owning your actions shows maturity and opens the door to healing.
Be Willing to Forgive: Holding onto resentment keeps conflict alive. Forgiveness allows you and your teammates to move forward without carrying extra emotional weight.
Repair the Relationship, Not Just the Problem: Resolving the issue is important, but rebuilding trust is what truly repairs a team. Focus on restoring respect and connection.
Offer a Genuine Apology: A real apology includes honesty, reflection, and a desire to make things right. Sincere apologies show that you value the relationship more than being right.
Accept Apologies with Openness: When someone makes an effort to apologize, meet them with understanding. Acceptance encourages accountability and strengthens team unity.
Create Space for Honest Conversation: Reconciliation depends on open dialogue where both sides can speak freely. Creating this space shows respect and a desire to understand.
Let Go of the Need to "Win": Reconciliation is not about who was right or wrong, but how to move forward together. Prioritizing peace over pride keeps the team stronger.
Rebuild Through Actions, Not Just Words: Trust takes time and consistency. Show your commitment to reconciliation through positive behavior and follow-through.
Know That Reconciliation Takes Time: Some conflicts leave lasting effects. Be patient with the process and allow space for healing to happen naturally.
Value the Relationship Over the Argument: Conflict can divide, but reconciliation rebuilds. Reminding yourself why the relationship matters helps you stay committed to resolution.
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EXAMINE - Resolution
Resolving conflict is not about winning or losing, but about finding common ground and building a stronger team moving forward. When you approach conflict with a collaborative mindset, you create space for shared solutions, mutual respect, and long-term success. Working together toward resolution shows leadership, accountability, and a true commitment to team unity.
Focus on Moving Forward: Resolution means finding a path beyond the conflict. Shift your mindset from dwelling on the problem to creating positive steps ahead.
Work Toward Mutual Understanding: True resolution happens when both sides feel heard and valued. Aim to understand as much as you want to be understood.
Collaborate on Solutions, Not Just Compromises: Instead of settling for the middle, work together to find outcomes that benefit the team. Collaboration leads to stronger and more creative resolutions.
Stay Open to Feedback: Be willing to hear suggestions and consider changes to your own approach. Openness builds respect and trust in any team environment.
Define Clear Next Steps: Resolution should include specific actions both sides agree to. Clarity prevents confusion and ensures accountability.
Hold Yourself and Others Accountable: Follow through on what you agree to during the resolution process. Accountability keeps conflict from resurfacing and shows integrity.
Avoid Revisiting Resolved Issues: Once a resolution is made, commit to it. Constantly reopening old conflicts weakens team trust and slows progress.
Respect the Process, Even When It’s Tough: Collaborative resolution takes time, patience, and effort. Staying committed shows leadership and emotional maturity.
Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection: Even small improvements in communication and teamwork deserve recognition. Positive reinforcement keeps the team growing.
Remember That Resolution Strengthens the Team: Facing and resolving conflict together builds resilience. A team that works through challenges becomes stronger, more connected, and more successful.
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ENGAGE - Conflict Resolution
Please look over the following prompts. You’ll be asked to participate in a short discussion about what you have learned, either individually or in a group, with a REBOOT Coach and/or guest speakers. Think about how these lessons will benefit you most in school, competition, and life!
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QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF :
[Perspective]
Think about a time you disagreed with someone. Looking back, what might their point of view have been, and how could understanding their perspective have changed your response?
[Reconciliation]
Have you ever worked through a conflict and restored a relationship afterward? What helped make that reconciliation possible? What got in the way?
[Resolution and Collaboration]
When facing a disagreement or problem, how do you try to find solutions that benefit everyone involved? What strategies help you work through issues as part of a team?
QUESTIONS TO ASK OTHERS :
[Perspective]
How do you help students or athletes see a situation from someone else’s point of view during a conflict or disagreement?
[Reconciliation]
What does reconciliation look like in your leadership role, and how do you support team members in rebuilding trust after conflict?
[Resolution and Collaboration]
How do you guide individuals or groups through problem-solving when there’s tension or miscommunication? What’s your process for reaching collaborative solutions?
Additional Resources - CONFLICT RESOLUTION
If you would like to learn more about conflict resolution, please consider the following resources!
FLCC Athletics - 8/GREAT - HANDOUT - CONFLICT RESOLUTION [PDF]
Conflict Resolution
Michael Van Etten - REBOOT - Didactic Tactics LLC - All Rights Reserved